Mens Work
it’s time for a new framing of what it means to be a man. one that creates space for those of us that identify with that label to celebrate a more full spectrum of our humanity.
mens work serves this function.
through practice, relationship & exploration we are addressing the patterns of suppression & domination that limit our ability to be fully human.
i facilitate open containers, closed containers & 1:1 work
learn more below
the open container
twice monthly i hold space for an open container where all those that identify as men are welcome.
these are in-person, donation based, come as you can gatherings.
some guys are there every time. others float in & out.
these session are hosted on the 1st & 3rd Tuesday evening of each month at Mystic Flora Apothecary, they’ve been running consistently since the spring of 2024.
here’s the details if you’d like to come.
when: 1st & 3rd Tuesday from 7-9pm
where: Mystic Flora Apothecary (1501 El Camino Real Ste F, Belmont, CA 94002)
no rsvp necessary, just come.
if you’d like more info please reach out via the form at the bottom of this page.
the closed container
once a year i facilitate a closed container. these containers are multi-month experiences designed to disrupt the patriarchal programing that limits our humanity & build community with other men doing the work.
these containers run on a pre-determined schedule. all participants are asked to attend all sessions. no additional participants are added once the group begins (that’s what makes them “closed”).
if you’re interested in this type of work please fill out the form below to get on the waitlist for the next container.
what the guys are saying
“I love being able to do something that allows me to connect with other men in a way that I believe is no longer common in our American version of Western society. It lets me healthily engage with aspects of spirituality, brotherhood, community, myth, and culture without problematic aspects of tribalism, ethnocentrism, or appropriation. I choose to come (when available) because I can see the intent and care that the organizers put into Men’s Group - I see that they believe in what they practice and put care into it. It creates a genuine and honest experience that I feel a part of - It feels good to belong to something.
Lastly, it is very valuable to me that Men’s Group is not a place where colonized and fetishized versions of spirituality, culture, and myth take place. I have had a number of bad experiences with how these things can thrive in “spiritual” communities and I am grateful for how I see something different here. ”
Keali’i
“The ritual and the breathwork are both incredibly valuable. The breathwork helps me to surface and let go of fears or experiences that are holding me back and it always ends with an optimistic vision for the future. The ritual, including the opening, prayers (or other practices), and discussion are also incredibly valuable. They are special in themselves and for me personally they also provide either inspiration or questions around my personal practices and beliefs.”
Nate
“It helps me ground my personal process and the work of the stuff I'm going through and creates a space of clarity to see what direction to continue in”
Anselmo
“Men’s group provides a space where men can be vulnerable. In turn, this emotional catharsis strengthens me as a man. Appreciate the existence of this group. It helps balance my energy and strengthens bonds with my fellow man.”
Andras
“I love connecting with men regarding spiritual, social and mental wellness. ”
Ruben
“Really loved the session focused on grief and rage. Loved that it was very specific and tied it into an ancient emotion, with a blend of modern and traditional approaches to acknowledging and working through it. Big fan of the more general and the very specific sessions.
I love how it offers a space and structure to grow. I feel called to grow as an individual and this group shows me how to grow not just as an individual but with and through a group of like minded men.
This group has offered all of us a haven that spurs curiosity about existence, and makes recommendations on ways in which to improve my life as a man with and for others.”
Ryan
i’m notorious for forgetting to snap pictures of the work we do. it’s not something i prioritize but on some occasions i’ve been lucky enough to have folks around who do. here’s a few photos from some of the work over the years.
the philosophy behind the work
“The first act of violence that patriarchy demands of males is not violence toward women. Instead patriarchy demands of all males that they engage in acts of psychic self-mutilation, that they kill off the emotional parts of themselves. If an individual is not successful in emotionally crippling himself, he can count on patriarchal men to enact rituals of power that will assault his self-esteem.”
~ bell hooks, The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity & Love ~
now more than ever we (men) need to come into a more whole relationship with who we are at the emotionally embodied, psychic & relational levels.
for too many of us growth & evolution at these levels has been stunted & tainted by the culture of patriarchy (as spoken to so directly by bell hooks in the quote above).
we suffer as a result. so do those we are connected to. all of them.
this work is not just about becoming more emotionally-tapped-in, more intuitive, more empathetic & more compassionate (though it is about all these things).
what this work is really about is cultivating all of these dearly needed skills while also building the capacity to face life’s challenges with a strong spine, firmly rooted, honest & open. no matter what. i know of nothing more “manly” & nothing more needed from the men of our age.
(for a more clear understanding of what i mean when using the often triggering term (patriarchy) please check out my Substack article titled: the entity)
if you’re interested in working with me please fill out the form below.
i read & respond to every submission. if it feels like we may be a good fit i will follow up with next steps. if it doesn’t i will let you know.